Hello, My name is Erin Thomas I am a 29 year old woman who has been married to John for 10 years. I have been asked by many that I should blog. I figure I have to start somewhere so here I am. I have been through many obstacles since 2004. Before then I was a mom of 2 medically fragile children and a wife. I have learned so much from my kids that with thier problems, I have learned a lot about myself. I was born and raised in Southern California and moved to Texas in 1998. I was eager to move closer to my Boyfriend, now husband and wanted to give it a chance livng closer than 3 states away. I found a job and a place to live. Life was so different not being in my parents home and being completely on my own. I learned that bills need to be paid and money doesn't grow on tree's. It wasn't long before John and I decided to move in together. On March 17,1999 John proposed and asked me to be his wife. It was talked about and we went a few times to look at rings and things like that, but I wasn't prepared for John to propose. It was incredible. I felt like I was on top of the world. But Marriage takes work from both sides and although it's the best thing that can happen to someone in my opinion. John and I have been through more in 10 years than most marriages go through in a lifetime. Emma was born in November of 1999, and with medical problems facing us, we jumped in and enjoyed our baby. Well not long after Emma was born, we found our we were pregnant with her brother Joseph. The kids were 15 months apart. Joseph came with his own little world of medical problems and we spent many days and nights away from home in hospitals, while John worked and stayed home with Emma. Well, in 2003 my mom and dad decided to move to Texas and move closer to my family to be closer to my kids. In 2004 my dad fell very ill and passed away on Valentines day of 2004. That was extremely devistating for all of us. My dad was my Hero, always will be and to lose the strongest person in the world in your life, it takes a lot. I then changed my focus on to my mom, made sure she was ok, and just took care of her. She had her fair share of problems but was doing ok. Well in 2006 my mother suffered a Psychotic break, which is completely understandable with losing her spouse of 30 years. The doctors did not it was safe for her to live alone at home until she was more stable. So John and I sold our home and moved in with my mom. Now it had been 8 years since I had lived with my parents and when that took place, you become their child again and rules change and things like that. Well, time went on and in Feburary of 2007 my mom felt she did not need us living with her anymore and we bought a home not far from her. She came wtih me to pick out furniture and things and it was great. We moved out the 19th and that night my mom called me and she had fallen and could not get up. John and i rushed over to her house and called 911. She went to the hospital and we waited forever in the Emergency room and we found her a room around Noon. Well, I had not slept yet and i told my mom I would be back later, i needed some sleep. So I went home and talked to my mom on and off all day into the evening and she told me just to come up there in the Morning. Well, she called me about 630am on the 21st and gave me her order for Sonic. I was planning on leaving when the kids left for school. Well at 700am the hospital called and told me my mom had passed away. I mean before my mind could absorb it all my world had been flipped inside out and sideways. I had my mothers affairs to get in order and things like that. I called the family and her funeral came and went. Well, My mom and dad's house was built from the ground up to accomodate my dad's wheelchair. It was the perfect house for our family. I battled with selling it. I battled with moving into it, even though we JUST bought a house. Well, the pro's out weighed the cons and we moved back into my mom's house. Now, moving twice in 5 days is not something I want to do ever agian. I told John if we move into this home, I am not moving again until Emma's out of high school. I was somewhat joking but at the time i was soo serious. Well, the days turned into weeks, weeks into months and so on. My Son had started Kindergarten and Emma Second grade. It was a great day in our life. I was so proud of both of them. Joseph had overcome so many heath issues and the most recent was a cervical fusion of his neck. He came home his first day and was very tired, but that was to be expected. Same the Second day, but the third day, he came home and had a REALLY hard day at school. He came home and took a nap. Woke up to eat dinner, and went back to bed. Well, at 945pm August 2007 my son's battle ended and he went upstairs to be with God. We did CPR until EMS got to the house, his nurse and I trading off compressions wtih Bagging him. Now the thoughts going throuh my head I couldn't tell you today, I just knew I was going to be able to bring him back. I was praying as hard as I could not to take him from me. John and I got to the hospital and the 15 min wait to see if the doctors could do anything for him seemed like HOURS. John and I sat in the family room pacing, I was going through everything in my head and it was everything we were suppose to have done and nothing fell short. The doctor finally came in and told us there was nothing more they could do for him and he was so sorry. Those are words no mother, father, parent. Should ever have to hear. I fell to my knees just sobbing. I didn't know what to do. I went in to see my son, I wanted to say Good-Bye, and although I had lost my parents years and months before, this was earth shattering. For once in my life I did not know what to do. I was in shock..Well, the family and friends John and I have are remarkable and We have such a strong support system for us, I honestly think that's the reason we have made it as well as we have. The days and weeks ahead were something I couldn't think about. I once again called family and his funeral was amazing. So many people affected by Joseph and my family was just over-whelming. I know John gave a speech and I was able to speak a little bit and I was just going through the motions. Alot of that day is very blurry, and there's a lot I can't recall. But losing Joseph changed me, and changed me forever and for the better. I have been asked how I hold it together when it's expected for me to just fall apart. I don't know how I do it, I just do. Well, I am going to close this for now. You know now what life has been like the past 5 years and when I blog you will have better understanding of what it's about and where I am comming from...
Until Later..
~Erin
